How it All Began

Her foot bounces up and down very quickly, she hits ‘refresh’ on her emails, nothing. What the hell is taking him so long to reply she thinks, refresh, nothing. Her heart is beating very quickly, her desk phone rings, ‘Hello Unistar Global, Geroga speaking’ she rolls her eyes, ugh it’s that idiot from accounts in the QLD office. She is always calling at the worst of times she thinks. Her email lights up, it’s him, a shot of adrenaline surges through her body like an electric shock. ‘Look, sorry Margaret, I have to go, I have about four other phone calls on hold’ she hangs up the phone immediately and opens the unread email, devouring every word she reads.

‘Haha yeah I knew you would have good taste in beer, you look like a girl who knows her beer. Maybe we should grab a beer sometime’ she smiled and re-read it over and over again. Is he serious she thought,  yeh let’s go grab a beer I’m sure your wife won’t mind at all, he was bluffing, trying to be flirtatious, that’s all it was a bit flirting here or there. She hit reply,

‘Yeh sure let’s just go out haha’ trying to be as sarcastic as possible over an email. This back forth flirting had been going on for about two weeks now, she didn’t really feel guilty about the whole thing it’s not as if she or he were cheating, it was some harmless flirting and nothing she hadn’t entertained before. Her email lit up again.

‘Sure we can, how about Friday after work at say the Star Hotel?’ She froze, in all the years she has playfully flirted and no one had ever actually pursued it, no one had ever taken it that one step further. What should she reply she thought, obviously this wasn’t harmless flirting anymore, going out for a drink meant she would have to lie to her boyfriend of seven years, it meant he would have to lie to his wife. She felt so unsure on what to do, her curious side wanted to say yes, she almost felt like she had to as she had been flirting with him for so long but she knew it wasn’t right, she knew she should say no. She got up to make a cup of tea and to think without the phone interrupting her thoughts. Her mind raced as did her heart, she weighed up the options over and over and got mad at herself every few seconds for even thinking of saying yes. What would one drink hurt, he is a colleague, nothing wrong with having a drink with a colleague but then if there was nothing wrong with it, no guilt associated with it then why did she have to lie? The truth was because it wasn’t harmless at all.

 

It got to Friday morning and she had decided not to go, however, she found herself making extra effort in getting ready and packing her deodorant and make up, something she never did. It was like her unconscious self had already decided she was going and was packing for her, her conscious and inner voice screamed no. As she kissed Jon goodbye she found herself speaking, not even meaning to, it was like the words just fell out. ‘Aw, I’m going out for drinks after work with a few people’. There it was, the first lie. She felt sick, the worst thing was he was totally fine about it. He never really stopped her from doing anything; actually sometimes she thought he didn’t really care what she did. On her drive to work the scenario of what was to come later played out in her head over and over again. She arrived at work and still wasn’t sure if she’d go or not. Adrian kept asking and trying to persuade her as she played hard to get, not that she was doing this on purpose. It got to 5:00pm and she could hear him coming down the stairs, she prepared herself, she knew it was him as he had certain stepping pattern. Deep breathe. He leaned over her desk, ‘so you coming?’ She paused and looked up at, ‘okay’. He smiled and walked out.

She jumped up, grabbed her bag and ran to the bathroom, she frantically adjusted her make up and fixed her hair.

 

She arrived at the bar, sweaty, heart racing and nervous as hell. She walked in and saw him immediately, jug on table and two glasses, she walked over to him ‘I assumed you wanted beer? That’s why we are here isn’t, to discuss our love if beer?’  He smiled at her cheekily. She was so nervous that when she went to speak, her voice shook. They spent about an hour talking about work, themselves, everything besides why they were actually there. It was all extremely awkward. They finished their drinks, ‘well I better get going, Bell will be wondering where I am’ he announced suddenly. The whole hour they had avoided speaking the names of their partners, she preferred it like this, it meant that she could forget about the reality of this situation. She instantly felt guilty and wanted to run away, this poor woman was waiting at home on a Friday night for her husband and he was there with her. They walked out of the pub in silence, she awkwardly pointed at her car ‘this is me, thanks for the beer’ she said edging to her car. ‘Wait’ he said quickly as he grabbed her hand. The electricity of his touch shot through her body, weeks of flirtatious conversations and she realized they had never touched before. ‘Why did you decide he come?’ He asked. Now he asks she thought after an hour of small talk, now in a shitty suburban pub car park he asks her. ‘Umm I’m not see really sure, I guess I was curious’ she admitted honestly. ‘So what would you do if I kissed you right now?’ She began to shake, ‘umm’ he leaned closer into her and stopped inches from her, lips almost touching. ‘Can I kiss you?’ She nodded ever so slightly.Image

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